| Better to Have Loved & Lost, or Not?Sometimes I wonder. I understand the principal behind loving and losing verses never loving. However, there are times when it just doesn't seem worth it. When your heart is broken in a thousand pieces. You can lose focus on yourself, your own priorities, and get to the point where you don't even care anymore. Life's just not worth living, right?
It makes you think. Was it really worth it? All for a prospect of a perfect love and a short-term happiness? What was your state beforehand? Did it do you damage? Are you less of a person? Less content, less focussed on positive steps in your life now? I think that goes equally to those still in love, too. Are you caring more about them than your own happiness?
Love's a confusing game sometimes, and often looks like a lose-lose situation. Why is it that we let ourselves get lost in it like that? What is so awesome, so important about it that it can give us our greatest joy or our most drastic defeat?
I think there's three angles that this comes from.
1) Our own love for ourselves. Often we feel we need another to love us, another to care for us, because we feel so alone. We need someone to up our spirits and confidence, because we are not capable of doing so ourselves. This creates a dependance that makes the possible break up all that much worse. Probably a large cause in why there are so many failed relationships, because we jump from one to another to try and find that happiness we believe we cannot find alone.
2) We were created to love, and from love. God created us with such a love for us that we hunger for it from others, and we were created with an urge to give that love too. When you look at everything that is God, it all is surrounded by love. It is the most important aspect of Him, and following Him. Without it, the rest is merely legalism or greed. Thusly, with such an urge so imbedded into us, how can we ignore the need to let it out? When we are then rejected of the love we feel we need to give, we are devastated because love is in the very fibre of our beings. We breathe it by nature.
3) As sort of hinted at above, God loves us. It is so easy to desire to find that kind of love from another human being on this earth because we want a physical love. Someone to hold us when we're upset or make us laugh when our spirits are down. Without realizing that all we have to do is look to Him. We don't need that physical one, it's only a human short-sighted desire. God is our reason to live, be happy, take care of ourselves, go forward in life, etc...everything that our mate is supposed to bring out in us, right? Best part, God never leaves us. There's no cheating or abuse, no fear that they will find another or walk away. He's always there, and always willing to take us back when we stray. He's the perfect mate. Yet so many overlook Him in the search for physical bliss. In doing so, we head to almost certain destruction because no human can offer that love He gives us which we crave.
I think one of the biggest revelations I've had in regards to a broken heart, is realizing that it's a blessing. To love someone so much that we hurt when we lose them is wonderful, it's a touch of God's love that we can experience. Rather than fighting it we need to embrace it, realize it's a part of our very being to feel this. It's an honor to love, and to be able to walk away with our heads high knowing that we do so. Just don't let it destroy you, let it empower you instead.
Love everyone, without fear of hurt. Love, knowing you are always loved by the One who is greatest. Love yourself. Love life.
Blessings and Love,
Sarah |
